I feel as if no one cares

Except from family , I feel people at school don't care. That they are just classmates and don't really want me. Why are some good advices for this other than "just be yourself." I don't feel as if "focus on yourself" will help because I wanna. Connection that I can't really get. I feel invisible. I also feel as if I did soemthjgn wring people will be quick to hate on me like if I performed bad in school football. I feel this is unfair and it's hard to jot just stop caring what people think. I understand peopel only care if your provide something for them but It's unfair I have to be a material possession to someone else. I also understand peopel are obsessed with tiktok brainrot in my school and will ignore you if you don't talk about brainrot

EDIT, PLEASE READ: Feeling like no one cares is not wanting people in your business or checking up on you. It's more about feeling invisible. Like yih could disappear and no one would notice (this is one of the reasons why people commit) but they don't acknowledge you include you and just ignore. It's a form of being quite disliked. While you look around and feel everyone has the exact opposite. You can't just focus on yourself when you invisible because humans need connection even if you try be independent the idea that you don't matter is constantly reinforced and even makes u hopeless as you will be wondering which of your "deficiencies" cause this. And no, It's not asking for alot.

Now let me tell you the real story. I have a mentally ill friend for 8 months. They have social anxiety. The reason I posted this as if it was my problem is because I feared I would get unhelpful advice such as "just set boundaries." Today he was ranting about how he felt invisible. It first started by seeing a classmate of ours and him saying "even he gets attention" he then started to talk about how he felt like he didn't exist and therefore nobody cared as he claimed his own friends were ignoring him. He then started to complain about how another classmate of ours was having beef with a kid in a lower year group and people were defending this friend of ours while he said no one would even bother to help if it was him. He then said hi to a girl he knew who ignored her because she didn't hear him. Then he said "proved my point". He then went to say life is unfair in that other kids have people who like them and even teachers but he gets ignored by his own friends. I definitely suggest the advice like "focus on yourself" but that didn't work (just explained why) and he said if he did bad at football everyone would shout and hate on him but not others. He blamed his social Awkwardness for why peopel treated this way and has already tried the advice "put yourself out there" but due to his hyper sensitivity to rejection he felt as if it didn't work. He is quite sensitive to rejection and even if someone turns around for half a second he assumes they think he's awkward and dislike him.

So what actually worked? The last advice that worked is "People are obsessed with tiktok brainrot and will ignore you if you talk about something else." This relieved him as he felt the blame was to be put on other's for their weird interests. Unfortunately that advice didn't work for today's rant. However what worked was this.

• People only keep each other around to make fun of them. For example, people make diddy jokes about X (who is black). When X is not playing along with the jokes or making fun of himself, he gets ignored. This also happens with other people especially when it comes to terrorist jokes or fat jokes like Y (fat kid).

• As for A (Person who got into beef), people said they would defend him but when they people who wanted to fight came, he had to run on his own and the only time he ran with friends is because those people had beef with his friends before as well.

• your friends (the one he said are ignoring him) are not less about talking and more about pushing around and playfighting. This is the opposite of you as you do not like to playfight.

• There once was a time where me and others were hanging out in the usual spot by the new building. B did something annoying to Y (same fat kid) and then Y got into a circle with me, jack and 2 other people and Oscar asked “does anyone actually like B” and everyone else went “no.” However, your friends don’t talk shit

• At lunchtime, that girl ignored you because she was getting shouted at by another girl and couldn’t hear you. I could hear it. (I just mentioned this girl)

What I did is showed him other times kids in our school were ignored and shifted them blame of his "awkaardness" from him to others. Telling him people only people only befriend others if they can make jokes about them shows that others are not looking for special qualities in others like confidence, which he felt he didn't have but instead are just being jokers. I also reassured him that the person who was getting into the beef was getting less special treatment as he thought he did, also display that peopel are also fake to others and not just him. His friends like to playfight and don't focus too much on talking. This is opposite from his personality and I highlight that this contrast may cause issues with connecting, and it was not because of any of his "flaws." Also, I just had to give him some general reassurance about that girl.

He is hypersensitive to rejection and through giving out new perspectives, I managed to relax him on his worries about being ignored and therefore feeling invisible.

So next time, when giving advice. Please understand what people mean behind their words. I know it's unhelpful with the lack of explanation but a quick Google search/youtube video should explain it. Mentally ill people are definitely hard to deal with when it comes to communicating their emotions properly. When the next post comes with the same issue, I suggest you tell them that "people sometimes only hang out with eachother to make jokes and ridicule them and it's funny so they keep them around" you may not know their situation but do prompt for the future worried redditor to elaborate and look through post history to see if there's any other key details you can turn into advice.

Furthermore, low self worth comes from what people say. Low self worth does not cause you to over care what people think, it's the other way around. People on redditors are so obsessed with self worth they think it causes every mental problem and telling yourself positive things will fix them. Not the case.